last night, as i sat alone looking at randomness on here, thinking about the present, dwelling on the past & planning for the future…
i re-read the most intimate post i’ve shared on here.
and i was ever so gently reminded that i have someone extra special waiting for me.
more importantly, i have someone extra special in Heaven to impress with this little life of mine.
i haven’t been doing a very good job of that lately.
i’m sorry, ej. please forgive me.
i need to make you proud of me as your mommy. your sisters here know what they see & feel the love i pour over them daily…
but you…i imagine you see much more.
you see me arguing with your father.
you see me complaining about a multitude of things.
you see me angry & frustrated.
you see me in ways i would never let ava or isla see me.
who knows…maybe you don’t & the fact that Jesus does should be enough to force the uglies out, but, for some reason right now, it’s not. for some reason though, you are inspiring me to be better.
starting now, i will be.
thank you, Lord, for all three of my inspiring, beautiful & amazing children.